Hello and welcome to my site!
As mothers, particularly during the early stages of mothering, we are acutely aware of the constant change inherent in life. Perhaps, now that you are a mother, it has never been clearer that life around you is always changing, requiring our flexibility. From infancy to adolescence, how easy it is to get caught up in efforts to manage and control the circumstances of life, which is going about mothering the hard way!
Mothering calls for many talents such as balancing self-care with “other-care,” and organizing multiple schedules. Life doesn’t always go the way we planned. We can surely benefit learning the art of allowing--of being less reactive to our thoughts and ideas about our circumstances. How easy it is, with all that is going on, to pinch ourselves off from the well-being that is natural to us!
The practice of “everyday mindfulness” can be a great help to mothers of children of all ages. My hope is that this will be a place to explore what the practice of everyday mindfulness offers:
living consciously aware, rather than on “auto pilot”
the choice to relax into life
treating ourselves with as much love and understanding we seek to give to our children
tapping in to the wisdom, clarity, and calm that is always available
We can be less anxious, more accepting and self-loving. Loving ourselves and our lives is the most important way we can be a "good mother".
Be sure to check out my book and my calendar for upcoming events and follow me on Instagram for the latest! I want to hear from you--it is so fun to hear from moms about their real lives. Feel free to ask questions or suggest a topic for me to address.
Warmly,
Dr. Liz
As mothers, particularly during the early stages of mothering, we are acutely aware of the constant change inherent in life. Perhaps, now that you are a mother, it has never been clearer that life around you is always changing, requiring our flexibility. From infancy to adolescence, how easy it is to get caught up in efforts to manage and control the circumstances of life, which is going about mothering the hard way!
Mothering calls for many talents such as balancing self-care with “other-care,” and organizing multiple schedules. Life doesn’t always go the way we planned. We can surely benefit learning the art of allowing--of being less reactive to our thoughts and ideas about our circumstances. How easy it is, with all that is going on, to pinch ourselves off from the well-being that is natural to us!
The practice of “everyday mindfulness” can be a great help to mothers of children of all ages. My hope is that this will be a place to explore what the practice of everyday mindfulness offers:
living consciously aware, rather than on “auto pilot”
the choice to relax into life
treating ourselves with as much love and understanding we seek to give to our children
tapping in to the wisdom, clarity, and calm that is always available
We can be less anxious, more accepting and self-loving. Loving ourselves and our lives is the most important way we can be a "good mother".
Be sure to check out my book and my calendar for upcoming events and follow me on Instagram for the latest! I want to hear from you--it is so fun to hear from moms about their real lives. Feel free to ask questions or suggest a topic for me to address.
Warmly,
Dr. Liz
Advanced Praise
for
Just This Moment
“Being a mother is hard work. Drawing on her years of clinical practice as a psychologist and her own experiences as a mother, Dr. Torres sets forth a home-based program using mindfulness techniques to help mothers navigate the many challenges of parenting. She offers up a beautifully written and honest book which is incredibly wise.”
-Ruta Nonacs, MD, Ph.D.,
Center for Women's Mental Health
Massachusetts General Hospital
Instructor in Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School
author of A Deeper Shade of Blue, Mom
-Ruta Nonacs, MD, Ph.D.,
Center for Women's Mental Health
Massachusetts General Hospital
Instructor in Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School
author of A Deeper Shade of Blue, Mom
“This is a wonderful book!!! Honestly, it is incredibly well written and a page turner.…Anxiety is the MOST prevalent symptom of pregnancy, postpartum, and motherhood and mindfulness is a tool that can be employed anytime and anywhere. Dr. Torres' book is a powerful approach that will help all moms lovingly connect with their pregnancies and with motherhood to find their own best ways to navigate through the difficult transitions.”
-Alison Reminick, MD, UCSD Assistant Professor
Director of Women’s Reproductive Mental Health Program
University of California, San Diego, Mom
“[The book was] enjoyable, like sitting with a good friend. I absolutely love how you weave real life examples of life as it is…being a mom and the importance of support, and also compassion for this tough and rewarding job we as mothers live each day.”
-Julianne Ballon-Casement, MSW
Mother of grown children in Los Angeles
-Alison Reminick, MD, UCSD Assistant Professor
Director of Women’s Reproductive Mental Health Program
University of California, San Diego, Mom
“[The book was] enjoyable, like sitting with a good friend. I absolutely love how you weave real life examples of life as it is…being a mom and the importance of support, and also compassion for this tough and rewarding job we as mothers live each day.”
-Julianne Ballon-Casement, MSW
Mother of grown children in Los Angeles
“I LOVED the book! And I think it serves all people—not just moms! One thing about being a mom is that you have a lifetime to be a good one (and I think of all the times when my kids were young and I might have been too busy with my career to be the best mom--but now, with my adult children, I am always available and mindful)! The ways that the reader can practice mindfulness are a blessing--and when a mom can't be there in person, she can learn to take care of herself! Since moms are the natural (and first caregivers), it's essential for them to know how to also care for themselves. Your book is a service to them!”
-Wilma Davidson, EdD
Author, Instructor at the University of South Florida
Mom of grown kids
-Wilma Davidson, EdD
Author, Instructor at the University of South Florida
Mom of grown kids
“Dr. Torres brings a fresh and wise eye to the challenge of mothering. She is open, personal, and practical in detailing brilliant insights into the inevitably sticky or messy moments of mothering. More than anything, she shares the ways that mindfulness practices can free us from impossible demands for perfection mothering. With humor, playfulness and genuine appreciation for the hard work mothers do (including the trials and the joys) she validates our complex experience of the essential role mothers play in everyone’s lives. By presenting her own struggles and amazing moments of “beyond joy” she invites mothers out of the isolation they often feel and into the warmth of acknowledgement and acceptance. This is a book to generously broaden our view of motherhood and ease our worry and sense of being alone in our uncertainties as mothers, in our exploding sense of love, and sometimes simply in our mind-numbing fatigue. Dr. Torres encourages us to find our own best mothering practices and join with other mothers in bringing a reduction of what could be considered the inevitable shame about our shortcomings as mothers. We are doing the best we can; this book provides us a bit more space for finding our way as mothers to being present, aware and loving. Thank you, Dr. Torres for your intelligence and clarity and warmth.”
-Judith V Jordan, Ph.D. Assistant Professor
Harvard Medical School
Founding Director, The International Center for Growth in Connection
Author, Mom
-Judith V Jordan, Ph.D. Assistant Professor
Harvard Medical School
Founding Director, The International Center for Growth in Connection
Author, Mom
“Great job - this is important work. I often tell people that when I lay down to sleep I never feel like I’ve done a great job as a mother. It’s not like taking a test where you can get 100% and there is no guarantee. That leads into a lot of what you talk about not being in control. I cried several times while reading the book while remembering my own experience. Preschool drop-offs and bedtime. Ugh. I think the 3-minute exercise was powerful. …I think good breathing is rewarding and makes you keep reading the book so you can take that breathing to the next level. I think mothering is painful and no one talks about it. I think it is gut and heart wrenching for a variety of reasons and mainly because life is difficult, and children go from 100 percent dependent to a separate and unpredictable individual. We can no longer keep them safe as we once did and if we can’t then we will have to watch them suffer. Children can die and we know we can’t control that so living with these realities will often overwhelm. Mindfulness helps to keep a passing emotional low from becoming your state of being. It helps you savor and affirm what you can do. Anxiety is about the past and the future. Mindfulness is about the present. I felt that the book flowed and that I didn’t feel overwhelmed with information. Mothers are all in—we need tools and support and relationships to take care of ourselves and others. Mindfulness in its full bloom and even the parts (stillness, breathing, nonjudgmental thinking) all support the journey, so I think this has the potential to help all mothers.”
-Melissa Sosa Fees, PhD
Clinical Psychologist
Mom of five in Arizona
-Melissa Sosa Fees, PhD
Clinical Psychologist
Mom of five in Arizona
“I've been practicing mindfulness for years now, but there is a switch when it comes to motherhood and it turns off. When I'm able to practice it at work, at home and with daily life it feels as though you have put on a new pair of glasses. You see thing clearer and your senses are heightened...BUT then when I see my kids or hear their voices it switches to mom pace. My mind starts going through my calendar and checklist like the credit in a movie. The pace written in your book, irritability, fear, control, anxiety...your book is reminding me that my identity as a mother is my identity as an individual. I need to practice mindfulness incorporating my children rather than independently. I love your book because I identify with it and not feel that I'm the only one struggling as well as reminding myself to enjoy my children…this book is so relatable...from insomnia to my mother passing away. I really think you've covered a lot in a women's life. This is why I think moms need the chapter 6, becoming the mindful mom. Love ACE, worry time, and PMR! I love this book!! Easy read and extremely relatable. I like the advice on how to be mindful.”
-Juin Nguyen
Working Mom of triplets in San Diego
“It drew me in and was relatable. That’s how I felt! …It was a relief to read and know I’m not the only one. I’m an overthinker too! …I’ve never heard people talk about the negative feelings during pregnancy.”
-Rachelle Pantig
Working Mom in San Diego
“I love what you say and how you say it! …I like how you keep everything simple with concrete suggestions.”
-Paula Karl, MSW
Mom in Boston
“Dealing with problems while raising children can be very challenging. I appreciated the section about dealing with chronic pain. Your writing about grief and thinking about ‘what could have been’ was helpful. That’s something I tend to do.”
-Tina Childers
Retired teacher
Mom of grown children in San Diego
-Juin Nguyen
Working Mom of triplets in San Diego
“It drew me in and was relatable. That’s how I felt! …It was a relief to read and know I’m not the only one. I’m an overthinker too! …I’ve never heard people talk about the negative feelings during pregnancy.”
-Rachelle Pantig
Working Mom in San Diego
“I love what you say and how you say it! …I like how you keep everything simple with concrete suggestions.”
-Paula Karl, MSW
Mom in Boston
“Dealing with problems while raising children can be very challenging. I appreciated the section about dealing with chronic pain. Your writing about grief and thinking about ‘what could have been’ was helpful. That’s something I tend to do.”
-Tina Childers
Retired teacher
Mom of grown children in San Diego
